<body><script type="text/javascript"> function setAttributeOnload(object, attribute, val) { if(window.addEventListener) { window.addEventListener('load', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }, false); } else { window.attachEvent('onload', function(){ object[attribute] = val; }); } } </script> <div id="navbar-iframe-container"></div> <script type="text/javascript" src="https://apis.google.com/js/plusone.js"></script> <script type="text/javascript"> gapi.load("gapi.iframes:gapi.iframes.style.bubble", function() { if (gapi.iframes && gapi.iframes.getContext) { gapi.iframes.getContext().openChild({ url: 'https://www.blogger.com/navbar.g?targetBlogID\x3d8640314034590187271\x26blogName\x3d10,000+Turnips\x26publishMode\x3dPUBLISH_MODE_HOSTED\x26navbarType\x3dBLUE\x26layoutType\x3dCLASSIC\x26searchRoot\x3dhttp://www.10000turnips.com/search\x26blogLocale\x3den\x26v\x3d2\x26homepageUrl\x3dhttp://www.10000turnips.com/\x26vt\x3d2470200286747080588', where: document.getElementById("navbar-iframe-container"), id: "navbar-iframe" }); } }); </script>

The Battle of the Premodifiermans




Everyone has a favorite, but some people are just wrong.

Typically, when you ask for someone’s favorite superhero, you’re going to hear either Batman or Superman. They’re the safety defaults. Sometimes Spider-Man slips in there, too, but he and his fucking hyphen can take a hike. This is between real men. Men of the super and bat variety.

Superman is pretty much a cliché at this point. Super strength, flight, x-ray vision, etc. He’s got it all, and he was born with it. His only care in the world is that little radioactive rock villains like to wave in his face now and again. Batman, on the other hand, is completely human. Weaknesses? Oh, you know. Bullets, bites, falling off a building, mortality in general. His crime-fighting puts him in constant danger from multitudes of sources, and he has only his wits and designed gadgets to keep him safe. When Batman kicks someone’s ass, it’s genuinely impressive. When Superman does, it’s just expected.

And yet, despite a plethora of natural weapons at his disposal, the easiest disguise and most gullible townspeople ever (glasses on, glasses off, glasses on, glasses off), and only one weapon in the universe that could harm him–-Superman died. You know who didn’t die? The guy who had a billion and a half ways of doing so.

Batman, for the win. Obviously.